March 88th, 2020

I have lost count of what day we are on with remote learning. I’m almost in danger of losing the last bit of sanity that I had prior to this endeavor. Yesterday was one of those days. Nothing horrific happened, in fact it was quite calm but it was awful just the same. I didn’t hide it well either because the hubby told me I was looking old after dinner. On a good day I would have had a decent comeback or at least went off on him, but last night he was right. This is hard. Trying to keep the kids on point with school is hard. Worrying about family and friends is hard. Wondering if we have enough toilet paper and other supplies is hard. And most days just being mom is hard.

Last night I waved my white flag and the day got the win. I went to bed completely wiped out, physically and mentally. I was already dreading morning and what was waiting for me. Want to guess how well I slept?

I basically set myself up for failure before I even made it to the starting line. While drinking my coffee this morning, I decided that no matter what the day brought I would not go to bed feeling like I did last night. Life took that as a challenge and countered with a few extra “fun” moments today to see if I could stay my course. It’s currently 4pm and I’m still upright and don’t feel as bad as I did yesterday but there’s still time to go downhill. Today has been proof that where you let your mind go, your day will follow.

I have had to take a break from social media scrolling because it’s too much. I can’t keep seeing staggering, scary numbers and conflicting reports. I do not want to see any more politicians blaming other politicians for what is going on. I can’t read any more posts from keyboard warriors that have something to say about EVERYTHING.

What is extremely disappointing is that we have a huge opportunity to be as great as we all think we are. We can actively save lives by limiting our actions. All we need to do is stay put in our homes. But where are we? Leaving disposable gloves all over parking lots, stockpiling toilet paper, grabbing ice cream with friends and putting our own wants over the needs of others. Will we ever go back to a time when we weren’t so selfish? If we can’t do it right now, I don’t think we ever will. When will we ever have the opportunity to be heroes, our only call to action being Netflix and chill? We’re blowing it.

It’s time to wake up and smell the quarantine. Think of the legacy we are leaving for future generations. How dumb will we look if we mess up STAYING HOME? We aren’t being asked to go to war, at most we are being asked to be inconvenienced. I don’t even like saying that because it sounds wrong but that’s the chief complaint. Some people are willing to put others in harms way because they don’t want to stay home. They want their normal back.

I don’t miss normal though because this is teaching me that what we have accepted as our normal sucks. Whatever your spiritual beliefs may be, I’m sure you have heard stories about the end of the world or the day of reckoning. I think we are living that reality right now. I’m not Chicken Little and saying the sky is falling but I do believe that this will be the end of the world as we know it. When this is over, time will be identified as either before covid or after. And humanity will be defined by their actions during covid. Again, the opportunity for us to write our story for all eternity is right now. Will we be known as a bunch of selfish individuals that wouldn’t adhere to simple restrictions because “we didn’t wanna” OR will we be defined as the generation that sacrificed their wants for the needs of others? Sounds like a no-brainer to me.

Maybe a better normal will emerge when this is all said and done. Let’s remember that this will most likely be the biggest event in our children’s lives and it’s up to us that they learn as much from it as possible. They can see firsthand that we are so much stronger when we are united and that simple acts can have the biggest impacts on others. No better time than now to be the example they need to see. While I’d love to say “No more defeated days from me. I’ll be Mary Poppins and sunshine from now till it’s over,” I know that’s a lie. But I do know that by taking a step back and focusing on what I can do better every day will hopefully make my days a little easier.

Challenge #2: Focus on what you can control. The Law of Attraction is real. The energy and vibes you put out to the world is what the universe will give you back.

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